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2005-05-22

svona í tilefni ekki alveg nýliðinna atburða:


"My Living Will"

I, _________________________ (fill in the blank),
being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be
kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in
the hands of peckerwood ethically challenged
politicians who couldn't pass ninth/tenth-grade
biology if their lives depended on it.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to
sit up and ask for a Tanqueray on the rocks, cold
beer, etc., it should be presumed that I won't ever
get better. When such a determination is reached,
I hereby instruct my spouse, children, and attending
physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, and
call it a day. Under no circumstances shall the
hypercritical members of the Legislature (State or
Federal) enact a special law to keep me on life-
support machinery. It is my wish that these boneheads
mind their own damn business and pay attention
instead to the health, education, and future of the
millions of Americans who aren't in a permanent coma.

Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into
this case. I don't care how many fundamentalist votes
they're trying to scrounge I couldn't care less if a
hundred religious zealots send e-mails to legislators
in which they pretend to care about me. I don't know
these people, and I certainly haven't authorized them
to preach and crusade on my behalf. They should
mind their own business, too.

If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns
my case into a political cause, I hereby promise to
come back from the grave and make his or her
existence a living hell.

_____________________ _____________________
Signature Witness
Date_________ Date ___________

(fundið hjá LadyHawk)

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